Dinner for two, and only two

The New York Times had an article today about the fact that parenting wrecks romance in marriage. I am not linking to it because I do not think that it is worth your time. I am not sure what people think romance looks like, but surely it is possible with children. Marriage isn't necessarily easy; we certainly didn't grow up watching happy marriages or learning how to communicate through conflict. But, through the bad patches (and, yes, we have had those) we have worked very hard (emphasis on the word "we".) Children require (deserve) their parent's energy, but they also need a father and mother that love each other. It doesn't take tons of money or a certain type of appearance; if that was true, all those poor couples on the covers of magazines in the checkout lines would be blissfully happy and there would be no slimy news. It takes a little time and thoughtfulness, a little creativity, and a heart filled with love and appreciation (sometimes a choice, not always a feeling). I think it is worth it.

Our choice for a Valentine's date? We celebrated last night with a quiet dinner in front of the fire (take-out Chinese) and Hamlet with Kenneth Branagh. The children were either at my mother's or in bed, quietly reading and knowing that this was our time. Rather than share the night with the crowds at over-priced restaurants, we chose this option. It means we can do it more often, and our children can see how important it is for us to have that time.

My most valued Valentine's present, though? I am ALL ALONE today. My husband has the day off, and he is taking all five children skiing. It is a momentous day for many reasons. The last time they skied, my then seven-year-old broke her leg. She is going back today for the first time, excited and confident; the resilience of youth strikes again. There is one huge addition: the almost six-year-old. We have a tradition in our family: you start skiing when you are seven. Don't ask; I have no idea why or when we came up with the rule, although I am sure it had to do with our finances. But, my husband decided that it was time for the Little Mister to ski, and he is going for an early birthday present. He ran to my mother and announced, "Gwam!! Guess what? We are bweaking twadition! I get to go skiing!" The word tradition, used by someone who doesn't have those "r" sounds down yet, was as cute as can be.


Not exactly traveling lightly

So my Valentine drove off with a car load this morning, ready to make more memories of cold days on the slopes. Weather conditions are perfect by our standards: just enough chance of snow showers to keep the fair weather folks back home, and enough chance of plain ol' cloudy to keep the family swishing their way to happiness.

What is a woman to do with an empty house? Hahahahahaha! So many choices, but the simple answer today is WORK.




I rearranged things to put my work table in front of my favorite window. This gives me the view of our property that is featured in the right hand corner of this blog. The hawks continue to make lots of noise, and I wanted to be ready to watch without interrupting my work. With the assistance of my favorite coffee pot and my trusty lap-top, it promises to be a very rewarding day. My boss will be glad to see the piles move from the left side of the table to the right. Trust me, Kate, when my copy editor returns home from the slopes, your inbox will be bursting with fascinating reviews. I promise.